four years ago i weighed 130 pounds. i was overwhelmed with social anxiety. i chose the gym over friends. i battled myself everyday and i never won.
four years ago i met you, and i met the rest of the gang that would become some of my closest friends. and we spent the summer in unadulterated bliss. and i miss everyone, but i don’t think anyone misses me.
just fed one of my dad’s six raccoons chips in the backyard #gettinwild
i just spent the last week with the gal who has had the biggest impact on my life in the past three years.
i sobbed leaving her family (they feel like my family)
i sobbed leaving her house (it’s too amazing)
i sobbed leaving virginia (it’s been so good to me)
and i want to sob at the thought that i won’t see her for months
cannot express these emotions accurately
Despite all my rage I am still holding cats on a page
if i didn’t have to go back to school, i would be moving to asheville right now, and i would get a coffee shop job and just live at asheville community yoga until i acquired enough self worth to do teacher training.
i almost want to just go ahead and do that instead of school, because a life of yoga, hiking, and studying whatever i feel compelled to, as well as living in that great community, sounds so much better than bullshit classes
You are allowed to grieve the years you lost to mental illness. You’re allowed to be mad that it happened to you. You’re allowed to pine after the person you might have been had it been different. But don’t let that get in the way of your growing into your new self and following a wholly new path for your life.